The fear of abandonment is a psychological phenomenon that can result in deep-seated emotional distress and relationship conflicts. Those who have experienced neglect in childhood or abandonment in past romantic relationships may develop a phobia about being left alone. Let’s discuss some signs of fear of abandonment and explore strategies for managing this challenging emotion. […]
I don’t think any of us intend to become a martyr. But boy it sure seems like many of us wind up playing that incredibly unhealthy role! Do you take on too much? Do you feel taken for granted? You may have martyr syndrome. How It Feels to be Taken for Granted The other day […]
Do you sometimes wonder if you’re losing your mind? Question your own memories? Do you doubt facts you once would have stated with pride? Or your own ability to judge character? Perhaps you feel as though your sanity is in question. The truth may be that your mind is perfectly intact. You may just be […]
Have you ever wondered what happened to that long-lost romance from your past? He or she was the one that got away, leaving you with unanswered questions and a lingering sense of what could have been. Seeking to find closure for a long-lost romance can be painful. But although it may be a challenging and […]
Most of us can probably relate to what it’s like to deal with someone who stonewalls us. We want to talk; they walk away. If a difficult topic arises, they avoid the issue or distract us with unrelated criticisms. Maybe they just change the subject in an effort to avoid real communication. Unfortunately, this practice […]
Learned helplessness is a psychological concept that refers to a state where people feel unable to change their circumstances, even when opportunities for change exist. In the context of relationships, learned helplessness can lead to feelings of powerlessness, resentment, and a lack of motivation to improve the relationship. Learned helplessness can doom a relationship. But […]
We humans are social creatures. We crave companionship and interaction with others. Besides satisfying these needs, healthy friendships, marriages, partnerships, and relationships with other family members provide us with love, support, and companionship. At times, however, negative feelings can overcome the good, and the result is an unhappy relationship. When this happens, we can begin […]
Relationships are an essential to our happiness and well-being. However, not all relationships are healthy and fulfilling. Some relationships are worse than merely unhealthy – they are downright dangerous and threatening to both our emotional and mental health. Understanding the signs of a toxic relationship is critical, because detecting these issues early makes it much […]
Do you believe in love at first sight? We’ve heard fairy tales about it, read books, heard songs, even watched movies where love at first sight is the main premise. Whether we believe them or not, people we know claim to have experienced it. Or perhaps we have experienced it ourselves. Do You Believe in […]
Relationships help us stay connected to the people we care about and provide us with a sense of belonging. However, relationships can also be challenging, especially when it comes to setting healthy boundaries. Boundaries are important, if not essential. They help us establish our needs, expectations, and limits. For the best outcomes, it’s key to […]
Relationships play a significant role in satisfying our needs for companionship, support, and human interaction. In this way, relationships, especially healthy ones, bolster both our physical and mental well-being. Unfortunately, relationships can also be a source of distress. Especially when our partner is unwilling or unable to satisfy our personal emotional relationships needs or unwilling […]
Relationships are challenging. People have different priorities, opinions, strengths, challenges, faults, skills, and idiosyncrasies. With all the different attitudes, thoughts, and feelings we each bring to a relationship, it’s kind of a miracle that any relationship is successful, let alone happy. But, despite all these complexities, it’s actually quite simple to predict which relationships will […]
Do you have a secret? If you’re like most people, you may have up to a dozen! We keep secrets for all kinds of reasons: shame, embarrassment, insecurity, to maintain privacy, or to protect someone else. Having a secret, in and of itself, doesn’t necessarily hurt us. It’s whether we dwell on it, and how […]
Emotional blackmail is a form of manipulation that is used to control an individual’s emotions, actions, and behavior. It is a tactic that involves the use of fear, guilt, shame, and obligation to get someone to do something that they may not want to do. Emotional blackmail can come from anyone, including family members, friends, […]
As we covered in our previous blog post on worry, overthinking and rumination, many of us suffer from intrusive thoughts that do not serve us. In fact, the majority of people experience persistent worries or overthinking at least from time to time. Strategies to counteract our tendency to worry and remedies for chronic overthinking vary […]
When you hear the term “low maintenance”, what comes to mind? Maybe a garden that doesn’t require much tending? Or a haircut that needs little attention? Maybe it’s a car that doesn’t require service very often. As people, we often consider being low maintenance a desirable quality. Why do we pride ourselves on requiring so little […]
We have all had to interact with people who we find immature or irresponsible. It can be annoying and frustrating. Both at home and work, it’s difficult to tolerate people who don’t own their own mistakes. People who avoid difficult conversations. Or resist committing to deadlines or goals. It’s easy to form opinions about people […]
In an earlier post, we wrote about how essential transparency is to relationships. In that piece, we talked about being honest with ourselves as the first step to having more open and honest relationships. This post focuses on another aspect of transparency. Specifically, how privacy and secrecy are connected and how they both are key […]
Are you in a relationship with someone who hesitates to take responsibility or make commitments? Do you know a grown person who behaves more like a child or teen? “Arrested development” is a term that describes this condition. It arises when a person is “stuck” at an early phase of emotional development. Causes of arrested […]
Achieving intimacy in relationships takes trust and courage. Knowing we need to let others see all of us is just the beginning. After we realize and accept how critical it is to allow ourselves to be truly vulnerable, it’s still very hard to do. This is where the courage part comes in. It’s a huge […]
A people-pleaser wants everyone to be happy. Everyone. All at the same time. Sounds unrealistic, right? To those of us who have this affliction, it’s our natural (almost uncontrollable) tendency (compulsion?) to pursue this unattainable goal. This means we constantly try to figure out everything we can do to maximize the happiness of those around […]
Your read that correctly. I propose we stomp out preaching the Golden Rule, once and for all. We all know it: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you”. Well, from my perspective (and I reckon for many other people), that’s definitely not a road to happiness. If the people around me […]
We most often speak of intimacy related to physical or sexual encounters. But intimacy has a much broader definition and is an essential component of a wide range of relationships. Sadly, many of our relationships today suffer from a lack of intimacy. It’s important for us to learn how to restore intimacy – before it’s too […]
Many of us want unconditional love. We equate unconditional love with being loved for who we are, with no strings attached. We also want to believe that we are capable of selfless and unconditional love of another person. But it’s not as easy as it sounds to love without conditions. And, at times, it’s not […]
Welcome to How to Find Happiness in 10 Weeks or Less, Week 7: What You Need to Know about Healthy Relationships. “Our relationship with ourselves sets the tone for every other relationship in our lives.” – Robert Holden This quote says it all! What a perfect way for us to start off this post, which […]
What does intimacy mean to you? Though other thoughts often come to mind when we hear the word ‘intimacy’ what an intimate relationship is really all about is being able to be authentic with another person. To share our true selves without restraint. Intimacy takes more than a willing partner. Sometimes that can actually be […]
Do you have trust issues? When we cannot or do not trust those close to us, it is difficult (if not impossible) for our relationship with that person to thrive and grow. In fact, relationships that lack trust can never be truly intimate or fulfilling. So, learning to take that risk, to trust someone, maybe even […]
