February is Annual Boost Self-Esteem Month. To observe it, Kindness-Compassion-and-Coaching.com is publishing a series of posts about the many aspects of this intriguing subject. If you would like to read the series from the beginning, please start with this piece: Self-Esteem: What You Need to Know and Secrets Revealed. Today’s post focuses on one major component of self-esteem: self-worth. We will cover the differences between self-worth and self-esteem, root causes and characteristics of low self-worth, how to help support a person who has low self-worth, and more.
The Difference between Self-Esteem and Self-Worth
As we have discussed, self-esteem is the foundation upon which our confidence, resilience, and overall well-being are built. It serves as a guiding force in our interactions, decisions, and overall satisfaction with life.
Self-worth and self-esteem are closely related but have distinct differences in their meaning and emphasis.
Understanding Self-Worth
Self-worth refers to the deep-seated belief in our inherent worth, deservingness, and value as a human being, irrespective of external factors or achievements.
It is based on the understanding that we each deserve love, respect, and happiness, regardless of our accomplishments or societal standards.
It is a foundational belief that contributes to a healthy sense of self and overall well-being.
Understanding Self-Esteem
Self-esteem, on the other hand, focuses more on our evaluation of our own competence, abilities, and worthiness based on external factors and achievements.
It refers to the degree to which we value and accept ourselves based on our perceived accomplishments, social standing, appearance, or other external sources of validation.
Self-esteem can fluctuate depending on how we view our successes, failures, or social comparison.
It is often influenced by external validation and feedback from others.
Signs of Low Self-Worth in Women
Low self-worth in women can manifest in various signs and behaviors.
Some common signs of low self-worth in women include:
- Women with low self-worth often struggle to believe in their abilities and may doubt themselves.
- They may frequently engage in self-critical or self-deprecating language, putting themselves down or minimizing their achievements.
- Women with low self-worth may seek validation and approval from others, relying on external sources to feel good about themselves.
- They may have a strong desire to please others, often at the expense of their own well-being or personal boundaries.
- Women with low self-worth may have perfectionistic tendencies, setting unrealistically high standards for themselves and feeling unworthy if they fail to meet them.
- They may struggle to assert their needs and put boundaries in place, often prioritizing the needs and desires of others above their own.
- Women with low self-worth may have an intense fear of rejection or abandonment, leading them to stay in unhealthy relationships or tolerate mistreatment.
- They may have a negative perception of their looks, body, or overall self-image, constantly comparing themselves to others and feeling inadequate.
- They may avoid taking risks or pursuing new opportunities due to a fear of failure or low belief in their capabilities.
- Women with low self-worth often struggle to accept compliments or internalize positive feedback, dismissing or downplaying their accomplishments.
It’s important to note that each person’s experience with low self-worth may vary, and these signs are not exhaustive.
If someone you know is displaying signs of low self-worth, offer her support and understanding.
Also, encourage her to seek professional help, if necessary. This can be beneficial in her journey toward building self-worth and improved well-being.
Root Causes of Low Self-Worth
Low self-worth can stem from various factors and experiences.
Some common contributors to low self-worth include:
- Negative experiences during childhood, such as abuse, neglect, excessive criticism, or constant invalidation, can significantly impact an individual’s self-worth.
- Constantly comparing oneself to others and feeling inadequate can erode self-worth. Social media, societal expectations, and cultural norms often contribute to this habit of comparison.
- Striving for unattainable perfection can be detrimental to self-worth. The unrealistic expectation of flawlessness leads to constant self-criticism and feelings of never being good enough, ultimately undermining one’s self-esteem.
- Frequent experiences of failure, setbacks, or repeated rejection can gradually chip away at one’s self-worth. These experiences can lead to feelings of incompetence, self-doubt, and a diminished sense of one’s capabilities and value.
- Internalizing negative and critical statements from others can significantly impact self-worth. When people believe negative feedback, they may come to internalize those beliefs as part of their identity, leading to a low sense of self-worth.
- Traumatic events, such as physical or emotional abuse, loss, or any experience that causes intense distress, can deeply impact an individual’s self-worth. These events can shatter one’s sense of safety, trust, and value.
- A lack of supportive and nurturing relationships can contribute to low self-worth. When people are surrounded by others who constantly criticize, belittle, or invalidate them, their self-worth can be significantly affected.
- Society often promotes certain standards of beauty, success, and achievement, which can lead to feelings of inadequacy if individuals believe they do not meet these standards.
- Mental health conditions, such as depression, anxiety, and eating disorders, can have a significant impact on one’s self-worth. These conditions often involve negative self-perception, self-critical thinking, and distorted beliefs about one’s worth and value.
It is important to recognize that low self-worth can be influenced by a combination of factors.
If you or someone you know is struggling with low self-worth, it may help to seek support from a mental health professional who can provide guidance and tools for building a healthier self-concept.
How to Support Someone with Low Self-Worth
Supporting someone with low self-worth involves providing empathy, understanding, and guidance.
Here are some ways you can help:
- Create a safe and non-judgmental space for the person to express their feelings and thoughts. Listen actively and validate their experiences, demonstrating empathy and understanding.
- Encourage the person to explore their thoughts and beliefs about themselves. Help them identify any negative self-perceptions or internalized criticisms and challenge them by providing alternative perspectives or evidence of their worth.
- Encourage self-acceptance by emphasizing that everyone has flaws and imperfections. Help the person practice self-compassion, encouraging them to treat themselves with kindness and understanding, especially during difficult times or when facing setbacks.
- Help the person identify and reframe negative self-talk and self-doubt. Encourage them to replace negative thoughts with positive affirmations or realistic and balanced perspectives.
- Help the person recognize their strengths, talents, and achievements. Encourage them to celebrate and acknowledge their successes, no matter how small, to build a more positive self-perception.
- Promote self-care activities that nurture their physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Help them prioritize self-care practices that promote self-worth, such as engaging in hobbies, practicing mindfulness, getting enough rest, and maintaining healthy boundaries in relationships.
- If their low self-worth persists or significantly affects their daily functioning and well-being, encourage them to seek support from a mental health professional.
Self-Worth: Definitions, Signs, Causes, Remedies
There are significant and fundamental differences between self-worth and self-esteem. Self-worth comprises one major portion of our perceptions of ourselves and is focused on our innate value as individuals.
There are specific signs to look for which may signal a person is struggling with low self-worth, and there are also well-known causes which may contribute to experiencing low self-worth as an adult.
Look for the signs in yourself and those you love. When you spot them, be extra kind. Both to yourself and others.
Simple kindness and human warmth and support helps us all feel safer, loved, valued, and secure.
Supporting someone else with low self-worth requires patience and understanding.
It may take time for them to improve their self-perception, and everyone’s journey is unique. Encourage them to seek professional help, if needed, as this can provide additional support and guidance on their path toward developing a healthier sense of self-worth.
If you’re ready to move onto the next article in this series, it’s here for you: How to Detect Healthy Self-Esteem in a Woman.
Thank you as always for reading.
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Joan Senio is the founder of KindCompassCoach. Her career includes 20+ years as a health care executive and 15 years (and counting) as a consultant. The common thread through Joan’s professional life has been a commitment to lead, mentor and coach current and future leaders, and women from all walks of life. KindCompassCoach provides information and advice grounded in Joan’s personal experience; however, all articles are backed by research and provide facts and advice from a wide variety of experts. Joan also serves as a thought-leader for KuelLife.com and is a regular contributor to PsychReg and Sixty and Me.
2 Responses
This is a huge one for me! I’ve struggled with both low self-worth and self-esteem all my life. Constantly criticized and neglected as a child, abusive husband and trauma in my life. I’ve sought out and received help, counseling and healing through seasons in my life, but still sense those deeply rooted insecurities.
Kathleen, thank you so much for sharing your experiences with all of us. We really appreciate it! And kudos to you for taking on these challenges.