We make so many decisions, all day, every day. Our brains call upon us to make choice after choice, often in a snap. To rise or hit the snooze? Shower or exercise? What should we wear? Eat breakfast or skip it? And these are the easy ones. Just think how much better our lives would be if we knew how to make great decisions every time.
Thousands of times a day we encounter crossroads and have to make a choice, often with little or no information. Our decisions may impact us, or our children, colleagues, or clients. Just thinking about it is exhausting. And doing it all day is daunting.
How to Make Great Decisions
We make many mundane choices: ice cream flavor, nail polish color, the clothes or accessories we purchase. The quality of our decision making in these situations probably doesn’t matter all that much. But in other circumstances, quality decision making becomes essential. Some of our choices can have major impact; in fact, they may change the course of our lives, or the lives of our loved ones.
- Which college to attend, which job offer to accept, who to marry and be-friend.
- Whether to walk down a dark alley, or join a questionable club or organization.
- How many children to have, when to have them; whether to adopt or foster.
- Homes to buy and sell, other investments to consider.
- Assessing health care treatment options for ourselves or family members.
- Boarding a boat, or jumping from a plane.
Then there are the literal ‘life or death’ decisions: when to cross the road in oncoming traffic, whether to text and drive, or making the choice to enlist in the military. Or donate a kidney. Yikes!
Decision Making Basics
When I started reading up on decision making, I noticed that scientists and authors make a pretty strong distinction between the act of making a decision vs. taking action on a choice we have made.
This distinction is not something I have often thought about. But there are many times in life when we can make a decision – but choose not act on it immediately. The timing of any action related to a specific decision is a completely separate choice. I filed this away as a good point to remember next time I’m agonizing about something. I can make a choice, but I don’t have to act on it until I’m ready. Good to know.
How to Make Great Decisions by the Numbers
I found information about 3 types of decisions (consumer, business, and personal); 4 different decision making styles (directive, analytical, conceptual, and behavior). I discovered one model that defines 7 steps to decision making while another defines 5. (Follow those links if you’re interested in learning more about this kind of stuff).
For me, the more compelling reading was about what, if anything, we can do, to improve our odds of making good decisions. So here are some things I discovered.
How to Make Great Decisions by Limiting Choices
There’s a thing called “choice overload”. Contrary to popular opinion, too many choices is NOT a good thing. I encounter choice overload whenever I go to the Cheesecake Factory or some other restaurant with a 20-page menu. Too many choices can be overwhelming and lead to indecisiveness.
So, when we can, we need to do what’s possible to limit our options.
There are practical ways to reduce the inconsequential choices we make each day. For example, if we always eat the same breakfast, rise at the same time, or limit the colors in our wardrobe, it takes a chunk of decisions off our plate every morning. Simplifying our morning routine helps preserve our decision making chops for later in the day, when we may need them more.
Rational Vs. Emotional Decision Making
Humans make two types of decisions: rational and emotional. At a certain point we wear out our ability to make rational decisions. At which point we become more likely to revert to emotional decision making. We don’t want to “use up” our rational decision making tolerance on inconsequential decisions. We need to be able to rely on it when those important decisions come our way. This is why limiting our choices, or decisions we have to make, can be valuable. It helps us preserve our ability to make rational decisions when it matters most.
Emotional decision making is not a bad thing.
In fact, it’s healthy to make emotional decisions, and there are times when it’s essential to “go with our gut”.
About the right things.
Our brains actually like to make emotional decisions – it’s a lot less tiring than making rational ones.
So, when picking out a pair of shoes, a movie to watch, or a brand of cereal, go ahead and let emotions sway you – the consequences of your choice will not be life altering.
Preserve that rational decision-making fuel for another time.
How to Make Great Decisions by Setting a Deadline
There are times when we analyze, analyze, analyze. And more choices keep popping up. We second guess our assumptions, ask others for advice, or even take a poll. We just can’t seem to make the decision we know we need to make.
The solution can be surprisingly simple: set a deadline.
Knowing there is an end to the process can help clarify and crystallize our thinking. Sometimes real life results in actual deadlines that force us to make choices. But even setting a “pretend” deadline can have the same impact. To go on that summer vacation or not? Make a decision by noon Wednesday, and then live with it.
This approach is not recommended for major life decisions.
But it sure can come in handy for some of those mid-tier decisions that we can obsess over if left to our own devices.
Timing Is Everything
As with many things, when it comes to decision making, timing can be everything.
There are times when we should avoid making significant choices, and being aware of them may save us some heartache.
For example, when we are feeling sad, we may tend to settle for something less than ideal.
So, when we feel sad is not a time to negotiate a deal.
We must wait until we have our mojo back to enter into negotiations.
Sadness may lead us to compromise too soon.
Similarly, when we are excited, our emotions can lead us to make choices based on a false feeling of optimism.
When we’re feeling more positive than usual, we may underestimate risks, or see too much up-side to a potentially dangerous or speculative endeavor. So when we’re pumped up is not a time to buy a stock or waterfront property. Better to wait til we’re feeling a little more like our baseline, usual selves.
It may go without saying, but we should all avoid decision making at any time when we feel our emotional or physical resources are limited.
When we’re sick, tired, sleep-deprived, sad, depressed, hungry, or just not feeling up to snuff, it’s a great time to procrastinate on major life choices if we can. Get a good night’s sleep, eat a hearty breakfast, and then make a better choice!
How to Make Great Decisions: A Call to Action
So, let’s take care of ourselves the best we can, and limit our choices when we can, and help ourselves to do the best we can, and make great decisions. Because our lives are full of promise and light, and doors are opening for each of us all the time.
Thank you as always for reading.
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Joan Senio is the founder of KindCompassCoach. Her career includes 20+ years as a health care executive and 15 years (and counting) as a consultant. The common thread through Joan’s professional life has been a commitment to lead, mentor and coach current and future leaders, and women from all walks of life. KindCompassCoach provides information and advice grounded in Joan’s personal experience; however, all articles are backed by research and provide facts and advice from a wide variety of experts. Joan also serves as a thought-leader for KuelLife.com and is a regular contributor to PsychReg and Sixty and Me.
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