When we’re are hit with an unexpected setback in life, it can make us feel uncertain. Depending on the nature of the situation, it may undermine our confidence, or create consternation that makes us uncomfortable. Sometimes, it feels like the best thing to do is to ignore a problem, hoping it will just go away on its own. Unfortunately, problems rarely resolve themselves well on their own – and they may get worse when left unattended. It’s good planning to have a strategy in mind that we can implement when life’s inevitable hiccups do occur.
Focus on What You Control
Focusing on what you control can be a helpful strategy anytime, but especially when things go awry.
It’s easy to get caught up in the what-ifs and thoughts about how things may have turned out differently.
But when we make an intentional effort to devote our attention to the things we have direct control over, it can make our thought process much more efficient and productive.
By focusing on what we can control, we also feel more confident and boost our self-esteem, as opposed to getting caught up in thought cycles that don’t add value and can actually be detrimental to our well-being.
Of course, there are of things in life that you can’t control. Certain stressful events or situations for example.
You can’t control relationships – the loss of a loved one, whether through a difficult break up, divorce, or death, for example. In situations like this, we need an alternative strategy to help us find comfort and strength.
In situations like this, having a strong support system is especially important. To build one, we need to prioritize our most healthy and strong relationships.
Prioritize Healthy Relationships
The people that really care about you are going to be the ones that come around to you in your hour of need.
It’s good to assess your relationships and consider who has shown up for you during those tough times in the past.
Consider them the backbone of your support system. And be especially sure to let them know how much you appreciate them. Be alert to their mindsets and life events and show up to support them during difficult times.
If you have people in your life who have let you down in the past, it may be worth considering how to alter those relationships going forward.
If they struggle with their own challenges, they may need you more than ever. However, if they are simply not invested in your relationship, it may be good to remember this in future days.
We all have a finite amount of love and attention to give – and it’s important for us to invest in relationships that include strong mutual respect and support.
Look After Your Health and Wellness
When life takes a turn for the worse, we truly benefit from being at our best physically and mentally.
This means attending to our nutrition, engaging in regular exercise, and also attending to our own self-care needs.
We each need different types of self-care, and we each need it at different frequencies to thrive. It’s important to understand what you personally need to stay well, and then to make getting it a priority in your life.
Doing so will help you to be at your best, in both good times and bad.
Get Professional Help
While there might be people in your life who will support you through the bad times, they might not always be equipped with the necessary skills you need.
For example, for alcohol or drug problems, it may be appropriate and necessary to seek a drug rehab nearby. These recovery centers are great for those who might not have the support available. Do not hesitate to reach out for help from professionals and to take advantage of community resources – there is no need to struggle to overcome difficult times alone.
Ready to try out some new strategies to help you achieve your life goals? Visit Life Coaching Techniques: How to Use the Best Ones Yourself.
Thank you as always for reading.
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Joan Senio is the founder of KindCompassCoach. Her career includes 20+ years as a private sector corporate executive and 15 years (and counting) as a consultant and coach. The common thread through her professional life has been a commitment to compassionate leadership, including leading and mentoring current and future leaders, and women from all walks of life. KindCompassCoach articles are backed by research and include facts and advice from a wide variety of experts. Joan is a member of the International Organization of Life Coaches, serves as a thought-leader for KuelLife.com and is a regular contributor to PsychReg and Sixty and Me.
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