Most of my days are shaped by the many chores, errands and tasks that appear on my to-do list. It’s overwhelming, in fact, how many things there are to remember, keep track of, and find the energy to do. But it’s a great feeling when we get to check things off the list, isn’t it?
Embracing A New Kind of To-Do List
A while ago I realized that my to-do list was basically the boss of me.
It shaped my days and ultimately, I figured out that meant that it was also shaping my life.
Big surprise, right? We are what we do.
So, I decided that I needed to harness the power of that doggone to-do list. Here’s what I decided to do about it.
I made a conscious decision to add things to my to-do list that were truly important – vs. chores and tasks and errands to were things I felt I “should” do.
So, although grocery shopping and trips to the vet will never disappear from my to-do list, there are many other, more inspiring things that pop up daily, too.
Tasks on my To-Do List
My to-do lists now include some mighty unusual things. In the spirit of happiness, for example, I might have a reminder to pet my dog. At least twice a day.
Another item may be to reflect on something I love about myself.
Even if it’s hard to come up with something, just the process is healthy and self-affirming.
Another to-do item might be to give myself a mini massage at my desk; or to drink a cup of herbal tea and gaze out the window.
Or to journal my thoughts in my ever-present notebook that I rarely seem to make time for anymore.
I have a standing to-do item that re-occurs every Wednesday.
It reads, simply, “Talk to someone who matters to you.”
You know those long-lost friendships? Has it been too long since you spoke to a certain sibling or friend?
My Wednesdays are always a happy mid-point to the week.
I’m convinced that those talks with people who matter are a big reason why.
How This To-Do List Is Life Changing
The reminders sprinkled in help me remember to do something important that, in some cases, entirely changes my state of mind. A short dose of unconditional love from my dog helps create a positive mindset so much more than picking up the dry cleaning. And a mini massage can be all it takes to give me the second wind I need to conquer an unexpected challenge.
Beyond To-Do Lists
There are many other kinds of lists that we can make to improve our state of mind. Most of them only take a few minutes to compose, but many of them will color your thinking for days to come once you do.
At times when you need encouragement, the prompts below may help rejuvenate you.
1. Who are the top 3 motivators I’ve known in my life?
These are people who encouraged us to do better, try harder, be happy. They believed in us even when we didn’t.
2. Who are the top 3 supporters I’ve had in my life?
These are those who have always encouraged us to follow our hearts; who have been there as a friend, even if they didn’t agree with all the choices we made; who have truly loved us unconditionally and without judgment.
3. What are 3 accomplishments that I’m most proud of?
Something other than our kids!
4. What are 3 times when I surprised yourself?
Times when we did better than we expected; when we conquered a fear or a phobia, or we were able to complete a task we thought was beyond us.
5. What are 3 times when I had “good luck”?
This could be times when we ran into someone “by accident”; when something serendipitous happened or when things just fell in to place unexpectedly.
6. Name 3 times when things turned out better than I expected.
This can be a great one to remind us to be optimistic.
7. What 3 qualities are my greatest strengths?
Don’t be modest – no one else will read your list.
8. What are 3 times when I received valuable advice?
At home, in your personal life, at work.
9. Who are 3 people in my daily life that I admire?
These may be people we think of as role models.
10. When were 3 times that I laughed uncontrollably?
What were you doing? Who were you with?
There are so many lists we can make.
In the few minutes it takes to make one, we can be flooded with gratitude and appreciation for our many blessings, happy memories we have, and the generous people who have supported us.
We can each come up with our own prompts, too.
And we can do it whenever we need a lift – no pen and paper required.
Waiting in line? Think of the 3 best meals you’ve ever eaten.
Sitting in traffic? Think of the 3 nicest things someone has ever said to you.
There are days when coming up with a Happiness List like one of the above can make all the difference.
Thank you as always for reading.
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Joan Senio is the founder of KindCompassCoach. Her career includes 20+ years as a private sector corporate executive and 15 years (and counting) as a consultant and coach. The common thread through her professional life has been a commitment to compassionate leadership, including leading and mentoring current and future leaders, and women from all walks of life. KindCompassCoach articles are backed by research and include facts and advice from a wide variety of experts. Joan is a member of the International Organization of Life Coaches, serves as a thought-leader for KuelLife.com and is a regular contributor to PsychReg and Sixty and Me.
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4 Responses
Joan, Wow! I love this. To be honest, I never even thought about adding motivational or self love “tasks” to my to do list habits. Such a great idea! Thank you for this post!
Thank you so much for your comment Laura! I’m glad you enjoyed this post.
Another fabulous post Joan! I love these list ideas you have suggested, they really encourage gratitude, positivity and appreciation. I’m going to start adding these into the blank pages of my Wellbeing Journal, so thank you so much for the inspiration! xx
Bexa | http://www.hellobexa.com
Joan, this is a great idea. I always have a to do list going but not necessarily a fun or happiness list.
I’m going to start one of these.Thank you!